A recent taping of The Charlie Rose Show focused on the study of human sexuality. Guests included Dr. Julie Heiman (Director of The Kinsey Institute) and Dr. Ed Laumann, of the University of Chicago. Watch the video here.
San Fran area men - curious what you can learn about pleasing women - from a self-identified "bisexual lesbian"? Check out this event from Good Vibrations:
Girl-Girl Tricks for Men
Monday, December 3, 8-10 pm
Kristy Lin Billuni knows how to make girls come. Do you? This class is designed for men who’d like to learn a trick or two from their lesbian sisters. Join Kristy, bisexual lesbian and former sex-worker, for a frolic through the world of girl-girl sex where you’ll learn what lesbians really do in bed and get a handle on the ins and outs of a woman’s hot zones. Full of great tips on technique, deeper knowledge of women’s pleasure anatomy, and ways to surprise your lover, this workshop will give you the tricks that women love!
Location: Good Vibrations in Berkeley, CA
All men welcome
For more information, visit the Good Vibrations web site.
Many people ask me about the human papillomavirus (HPV), particularly since the release and wide marketing of Gardasil, one of the world’s two HPV vaccines (and the only one currently FDA-approved for sale in the United States). Here are some things that you should know about HPV.
1. HPV is NOT - I repeat, NOT - the same as HIV. These are two VERY different viruses. HPV stands for the human papillomavirus and HIV stands for the human immunodeficiency virus.
2. How common is HPV? Some research reports suggest that as many as 60 to 80% of sexually active adults have been exposed to HPV through vaginal sex, anal sex or oral sex.
3. How is HPV transmitted? HPV can be transmitted through vaginal sex, anal sex or oral sex. And yes, even if you stick it in "just a little" or "just for a minute".
4. What is HPV? HPV refers to a virus although there are more than 100 strains of HPV. Some of these strains are sexually transmissible (meaning, they can be passed from one person to another during sexual contact); others are not.
5. What happens to someone if they get HPV? Scientists are still trying to understand the course of infection (what happens to a person once they get infected with HPV, how long it lives in their body, etc). As I mentioned before, about 60 to 80% of adults have been estimated to have come into contact with HPV through sexual contact. Not everyone who is exposed to HPV gets symptoms of HPV. Some strains of HPV can cause genital warts. Sometimes these warts very obviously look like warts; other times they look like little pimples and other times they can barely be seen by the naked eye. Other times a person might have a wart-related strain but never get any warts at all (i.e., they might be a carrier of the virus even if they don’t show the symptoms).
Other strains of HPV are what are considered "high risk" strains of HPV. These strains are associated with a higher risk for developing cervical cancer or vulvar cancer (among women), penile cancer (among men) or anal/rectal cancers (among women or men). Some recent research suggests that high risk strains of HPV may be associated with a higher risk of oral (mouth) cancers as well. This does not mean people with high risk versions will get cancer; it just means that they are at a slightly higher risk. It is important, if you have been diagnosed with a high risk strain of HPV, to follow up with your healthcare provider in the manner in which he or she recommends to you.
[Read more about whether condoms can prevent HPV, about the HPV vaccine, and about the little known fact that men cannot be tested for HPV… after the jump]
Question:
Hi Dr. Debby, My wife and I were wondering about toys made of pyrex glass. There are a lot of different ones out there. Some cheap and some expensive.
We keep looking at them and think it is not an item to go cheap on. But how safe are they? And are the worth the money? Also what should we be looking for to make sure it is of good quality? Thanks.
Answer:
We don’t have hard and fast rules when it comes to quality of the pyrex products (my sex toy company contacts tell me these toys are essentially pyrex but due to trademarks or something, they have to call them "glass"). As such, I would start with a company with a good reputation for choosing quality products such as Pure Romance, Good Vibrations, Early to Bed, Babeland or MyPleasure, all of whom tend to have rigorous processes through which they add products to their line-up.
Glass/Pyrex dildos have a distinct advantage in that you can warm them or cool them to your liking just by running them under warm or cool water. Smooth products (rather than those with seams on the shaft) are likely preferable for most people. You can use them with a variety of lubricants and they are easy to clean. In terms of being "worth the money", that varies from person to person, but they do certainly offer a unique experience that you can’t get with other dildos or vibrators, especially when it comes to temperature and their smooth qualities.
Some glass dildos you might check out: the Easy Rider from Pure Romance and the Pink Double Ended Glass Dildo from Early to Bed (photo after the jump - WOW).
Question:
Ok…so we all know that relationships are and can be confusing but here is the situation. I am currently seeing somebody and she has made it clear through conversations that i have overheard with her friends (I was not spying or anything, we were all in the car together) that we are not exclusive. This is great and I don’t mind this at all however the past couple of times that I have been with her it has become clear that she is attempting to take this relationship to the next level. I’m just not sure how to approach this situation as I do not want this to become a long term or involved relationship, I just want to keep it as a now strings attached type of deal. Also she has what I feel to be an attractive friend who she does not think is attractive, but that is a different story.
Answer:
Yes, relationships can indeed be confusing… they’re tricky little suckers. Especially when relationship partners don’t talk to one another and only rely on hearsay… as in this situation. If you do not want to take your relationship to "the next level" (what is this, Pac Man?) then you might want to talk to her about this in what’s sometimes called a Relationship Defining Conversation (RDC). Even if you don’t want to call it a RDC, if you want clarity you need to go for it. Try a "so we should probably talk about where this is and isn’t going" conversation. Whatever you want to call it, in the wide words of Nike, Just Do It.
Sometimes people are afraid to say "this isn’t going anywhere" to their partner because they worry that their partner will stop putting out, to put it blunty. Well, you’re an adult and you’re having sex and so you need to be responsible for her feelings and for what you’ve got going on here. I’m not saying you’re afraid of losing access to her vagina, but for some reason - fear? laziness? shyness? uncertainty about how to say it? - you have thus far chosen not to be extremely clear with her. And if I am wrong, and you have been EXTREMELY clear to her (e.g., "this isn’t going anywhere; I don’t want a relationship with you; I do want a non-exclusive hook up situation with you; and no, my feelings may never change for you") but she is just refusing to believe you and you sense that she still wants to take it to the next level, then you may need to be the responsible party here and end things before she gets in any deeper.
As for your other story, do say more. 