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I’ve often said to friends that I think traveling with someone is in many ways a microcosm of marriage. Rich experiences are plentiful and countless decisions are made in a relatively short amount of time. Budgeting, finding lodging, how you’ll spend your time, etc. are all negotiated constantly. To do so gracefully requires communication, compatibility, [...]
One year ago I began writing for MySexProfessor.com and since then, I’ve learned a lot. I thought I would write a little about the journey this year’s taken me on, so that readers can get a glimpse into the world of sex blogging. For one thing, I’ve learned to only call it “sex blogging” when [...]
Once upon a time I was kissing someone. This was nice. I did not, however, want to do more than kiss this person. And that decision was respected. But sometimes it’s not. I’m being sparse with the details here for a few reasons: I write about sexuality as a scholar, and I’d rather my audience [...]
In a previous post, I explored the idea of being able to verbalize what you are doing sexually, writing that if you cannot bring yourself to name the acts you’re doing or the body parts you’re doing them to, perhaps you should reconsider your readiness to do them. However, I’ve since thought more about the [...]
I got a kick out of this post giving advice on how to deal with unwelcome and persistent sexual advances from a friend. It emphasized communication as the primary strategy, recommending honest dialogue and even social shunning should the “friend” fail to understand why his actions are wrong (though the author admitted to having an [...]
Holly’s recent post on talking to your partner about sex got me thinking. It is, as she says, incredibly important to make concrete suggestions about what you’d like to try in bed, give specific feedback, and be encouraging and understanding when it takes a while for your comments to sink in and have an impact [...]
I was browsing sexuality forums recently, and saw somebody giving the advice: “If you can’t talk about it, you probably shouldn’t be doing it.” This notion intrigued me, so I decided to explore it further, considering how being able to verbalize one’s desires and actions can impact one’s sexual experiences and health. First, there’s your [...]
What, you may ask, is fluid bonding? And why should you care? Fluid bonding frequently comes up in the context of non-monogamous or polyamorous relationships, but it’s just as important for monogamous folks, because it entails discussion and negotiation of acceptable risks, intimacy, trust, and pleasure. Fluid bonding, at its most basic, is the agreement [...]
A post titled Mythcommunication over at the sex-positive blog Yes Means Yes raises some fascinating issues about the cultural refusal to hear the word “no” in conversation, and the ramifications for analyzing situations of sexual violence. Drawing on a published study analyzing refusals in everyday conversational language, the post reaches the conclusion that “in sex [...]
Does this sound familiar? Your partner does something that you don’t enjoy, you express this to them, and it starts a fight. Or, you’ve acted in a way your partner didn’t like, they complain about it, and BOOM: Conflict. I recently came across an article by Russell Bishop about the nature of criticism that I [...]
Loading ...Longtime MSP readers will know that we are big fans of Clarisse Thorn‘s writing: she intelligently tackles important sex topics such as BDSM, sexual submission, open relationships, and sex-positivity. So we of course were super-excited when her book, Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser, came out (available on Amazon and Smashwords and in paperback). Clarisse [...]
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